God Prepares Us

As we are now onto our fourth week in quarantine or “social distancing”, there is one thing that continues to be laid on my heart and mind: the truth that God prepares us for situations in life, even when we have no idea what He is doing.

I know that for many, this time being stuck at home has been a shock, adjustment and oftentimes challenging. I completely understand that. I want you to take a moment to pause and take a deep breath with me. Just take a deep breath in, hold it for four seconds, and let it out slowly.

Now, think about some of your more difficult seasons in life that you felt were impossible to overcome. Bear with me. Don’t focus on the bad but think about how you overcame them. Think about who, what and how you were strengthened to face those difficult seasons. Think about the lessons you learned from them.

Personally I’ve been thinking about this global situation and this topic a lot. I can’t help but look back on 2019 and imagine how I would have handled a global pandemic thrown into the mix of everything I was already dealing with. Let’s just say, I would have been even more of a mess than I already was. Thinking about this, often leaves me feeling humbled, proud and so very grateful for the progress I have made and the way God prepared me for such a time as this. I cherish His love for me in this way.

I figured I would give you some background information to let you know why this topic has been on my heart and mind throughout this. God spent the whole year of 2019 preparing me for what was to come in 2020. I truly and honestly believe that. If you haven’t read my previous blog posts, 2019 was a very challenging year for my mental and physical health. Because of how rough my health became over the year, I ended up taking two months off of work to focus on myself and gain healing. You can probably understand what I mean when I say that God prepared me for this time at home. Those two months taught me how to have self-discipline, reach out when I need connection and community, stay in a routine, exercise and grow my mind. All of which have been so very helpful for this past month of social distancing. He truly prepared me for this time and situation.

Maybe you aren’t in a similar place as me right now. Maybe you feel very unprepared and ill-equipped to be stuck in one place for such an extended period of time. Maybe your mental or physical health isn’t in a good spot, and you feel like you are drowning in fear. Believe me, I get it. But even if this time has been challenging, I still want to remind you that God has not left your side, He is strengthening you, and He is establishing your steps even now.

Isaiah 58:11 states, “And the LORD will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.” This verse is so encouraging and beautiful to me. The phrase”Make your bones strong” is so powerful! God not only sustains us and never leaves us during hardships, but He strengthens our bones both physically and mentally. God used my circumstances in 2019 and throughout my entire life to strengthen me.

Many of us around the world are questioning and wondering why God would allow this awful disease to spread and take so many lives. We often believe that if WE were God, we would never allow this to happen. We read in Proverbs 16:9, “The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.” The reality is we are NOT God and for good reason. We can plan our lives out down to the second, but it doesn’t mean that’s how life will happen. Most of the time, we plan our lives and it goes a completely different way than we imagined. Yet, somehow we look back and can’t imagine our life going any other way.

That’s because God knows what is best for us. I couldn’t possibly see how anything good could come out of my trials last year, but I am having manageable anxiety in the midst of a global pandemic. To even say those words is a miracle and testament to God’s process of strengthening His children. I had no idea why God would allow those things to happen in my life, and I even got frustrated with Him. I am now grateful for those experiences.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the fear, doubt, and anger during this pandemic. Media is constantly trying to bombard us with the latest numbers, stories, and heartbreak. But instead of focusing on the media and the fear, focus on how strong you really are. Focus on how much you have overcome in your life. Focus on the ways God has established your steps when you thought you couldn’t take one more. When we focus on those things, we gain confidence in ourselves and in God’s ability to turn this horrible situation into something beautiful. We begin to see the possible good that could be happening in the midst of such heartache.

I sincerely hope that you and your loved ones are safe and healthy. I hope this post gives you something positive to reflect on and focus your mind and heart on during this crazy time. I know this topic has helped me to change my mindset and attitude and has kept my focus on our Heavenly Father. It’s truly helped keep me sane, hopeful and healthy. I hope it helps you too.

I know that for many, this pandemic has brought unimaginable pain and heartache. My heart, thoughts, and prayers are going out to everyone affected.

I hope all who read this know that you are loved so deeply by our creator and our savior. He can handle our pain, sadness, and anger towards Him. He desires for us to come to Him in your pain. I believe that’s when He moves in us the most. It is my hope and prayer that this painful time makes us stronger as individuals, as Christ-followers, and as a community. Most importantly, I hope we learn how to love a little more like Jesus.

Hang in there. God’s got this. You are stronger than you know. Thank you for reading my rambles.

Hypervigilant

Merriam Webster Dictionary defines hyper-vigilance as, “the state of being highly or abnormally alert to potential danger or threat”. This is not to be confused with paranoia, “mental illness characterized by systematized delusions of persecution or grandeur usually without hallucinations”.

Normally hyper-vigilance is a term used when discussing PTSD or someone in a dangerous field of work; however, this term can also be used to describe those of us who experience anxiety disorders. On any typical day I am hyperaware of my surroundings and potential dangers that could be at play. My mind automatically thinks of the worst possible things that “could” happen, however highly unlikely. On a “good” day, I can allow those thoughts to flutter on by and shake them off as if they are just like any other thought. On my hard days, however, it’s not quite as easy.

My hard days often include: racing thoughts, constant “what ifs”, tense muscles, exhaustion, feeling “on edge”, irritability, and headaches. Most days are fairly “good” now, thanks to social support, medications, and therapy. Throw in a global pandemic, however, and my hard days have become my new normal again.

No matter how much I try to relax, turn off the news, or unwind, I constantly feel on edge these days. My shoulders creep up towards my ears, tensed. My stomach is always in knots, and I often sigh deeply just to get enough air, as I realize that I have been holding my breath. It feels as though I’m just waiting. Waiting for symptoms of the virus to HIT me out of nowhere, never knowing when it will strike. I am hypervigilant. Are you?

Hypervigilance isn’t always like you see on the movies. Sure, it can appear as constantly flinching at loud noises and acting out in irritability; however, I want you to know that a lot of the time, the battle of hypervigilance is within, unnoticeable to those around us and maybe even unrecognized by the person themselves.

My battle with hyper-vigilance is within. It’s a constant battle between fearing the worst, and feeling guilt and shame for not having enough faith. It’s not typically an outward struggle (unless illness is involved and then suddenly I’m washing my hands to the point of sores, wiping everything down with alcohol, and having a panic attack nearly every time I leave my house). It’s something that most people don’t notice. This is why it is so important that we check in on our friends during this unprecedented time. Even if our friends may not have a diagnosed mental illness like anxiety or depression, ALL of us are feeling the uncertainty and sometimes even the hyper-vigilance going on in the world right now.

Clinical Psychologist Karen Cassiday stated in an article by the Chicago Tribune, “The thing that makes the coronavirus difficult for people with anxiety is the level of uncertainty,” she said. “We know that when there’s uncertainty, then people with anxiety disorders try and narrow down the field of uncertainty to assume the worst-case scenario.” I would add to that and say that we are not merely trying to “narrow down the field of uncertainty” but we want answers. We want reassurance. We want to know the facts to know that we will be okay.

Moukaddam and Shah state, “Although the effects of the coronavirus on mental health have not been systematically studied, it is anticipated that COVID-19 will have rippling effects, especially based on current public reactions.” We are already seeing the effects of social distancing on those we love. Staying home, sometimes alone, is bound to lead to loneliness in most people. What we fail to recognize is the effects that this pandemic is having and will continue to have on individuals for years to come in regards to anxiety.

If you think about it, most of the world is experiencing hyper-vigilance right now. Please be intentional about reaching out to those you love. Be intentional about sharing how you are feeling about this pandemic. Be intentional about caring for yourself. Be intentional about putting your faith in God. Be intentional about having fun. If you do those things, the hyper-vigilance may not completely disappear, but it will help to know that you are not alone in this.

As a person of faith, I know that anything can happen any second of any day. I know that life could end instantly. I know that no human has any control over anything in this world, yet, my mind constantly fights for any sense of control. And that’s exactly what it is… a fight. A fight between faith in a God who loves me and is trustworthy, and my selfish, fearful, perfectionistic human nature.

I’ve had several people tell me throughout my life, but especially recently to “trust God and give it over to Him because He’s in control.” I know they mean well, but they aren’t telling me something that I don’t already know. I know that God is the only one in control. I know that I can trust him. I know that He is good. It’s not a matter of lack of faith or belief in those things, at least I don’t think it is. I appreciate the reminder, and sometimes it is helpful to be reminded of those truths, but it’s not a cure-all for my struggle, no matter how much I want it to be. God can and does bring me peace in the sense that: I know that He is with me, He will never leave my side, I am loved by Him, and no matter what happens, He’s got this. But that doesn’t always calm my racing thoughts, tense body, and emotions. Sometimes those truths do calm my mind and body, but most times they don’t.

Please know that if someone you love is really struggling with the way things are going right now in the world, just be a listening ear. Acknowledge their fears, talk through them, and if they are believers, pray WITH them, remind them of God’s love and goodness without dismissing their inner turmoil. Chances are if they are a devout follower of Jesus Christ, like myself, and struggle with their mental health, they KNOW God is in control, but they need love, gentleness and to know they are not alone or going “crazy”. Let’s stay home, wash our hands and be there for each other in ways we never knew we needed to be.

Thank you for reading my rambles.

If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out. The resources below would be glad to help you through this.

NAMI HelpLine, please call 800-950-NAMI (6264), Monday through Friday from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., ET, or send an email to info@nami.org.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – For youth and adults
(800) 273-TALK (8255)

http://www.remedlylive.com

Resources Used
https://www.psychiatrictimes.com/psychiatrists-beware-impact-coronavirus-pandemics-mental-health

https://www.chicagotribune.com/coronavirus/ct-coronavirus-ocd-anxiety-20200309-sxwxvepaevh73ec4w3cdtzgopa-story.html



The Journey Begins

Welcome! Thanks for taking time out of your day to check out my new blog! Allow me to briefly  introduce myself. My name is Sarah and I am in my early Twenties. I graduated with a B.S. in Counseling in 2018, and I am passionate about my faith and mental health. Now that you know a little bit about me, I’d like for you to get to know a little about my journey to this blog. 

 For several months now I have felt God nudging me to write. Throughout the past several months God has placed certain topics and points of interest on my heart to write about. Whenever these topics come up, I open the notepad app on my phone and write it down. Those topics have been sitting there for months now, but I have been too afraid to take the time to write them out. It’s scary to be vulnerable to the world and to put your writing out there for everyone to see. But more than that, it’s scary to be vulnerable and share my life stories and experiences with the world. 

However, After much consideration and prayer, I am finally making this blog. I didn’t want to ignore the nudges from God too long, and seeing as I am currently in a place of wondering what is next for me, it feels like the perfect time. I am so excited to share with you the things I am experiencing and learning throughout my journey. 

  It is my hope that those who read my blog can get a deeper insight into who I am. I am sharing my heart and my experiences to hopefully help others to know they are not alone and to shed some light on mental health topics. I also hope to educate readers on mental health issues and give practical ways to support those struggling. I plan to also integrate faith, with mental health. I truly believe that I have endured anxiety disorders and depression, so that I can help others. It is my hope and prayer that those who read this, will read it with an open mind, heart of compassion, and thoughtful insight. Thank you again for stopping by. I welcome any feedback you may have. Welcome to my rambles…

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton